Where Are You Now?

Have you ever felt like you are loosing your mind? As if you are no longer the person you knew, that you feel like a total stranger. That is what I've been feeling for most of this year but particularly over the past few months. I look in the mirror and I see a person I do not recognise, I feel as if I have become a mere shadow of myself, that pieces of me are slowing disappearing with the breeze and I hate this feeling. I can't think at all, it is as if someone how stolen my mind and just left the shell of it.

Nothing feels right this year. I have barely taken any photos this year. I used to always be attached to my damn camera, you couldn't tear me away from it. I would come home from a night out with pictures galore but this year has produced nothing, nothing! I even bought a new dSLR to give me some inspiration but no I have yet to seriously use the camera. I have concepts and ideas floating in my head but I lack the motivation to shoot them. I look at my camera and always say another day.

The words that would so effortlessly flow now I escape in a stutter. Everything I love is now like another book on the shelf, that just sits there gathering a thick layer of dust. I'm over this feeling, I just want out of this self destructive spiral. I want my mind back or maybe my mind is just past it used by date and can no longer produce those eloquent words that I used to fall in love with.

Is this the beginning of the end or is it the start of something new?


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Now playing: Death Cab For Cutie - Pity And Fear
via FoxyTunes